Written by: Peretz Green



Some Autobiographic Gnomen



Chapter 1


Gnomen 1 - DIARY of the DONKEY: Nov. 20, 1998, Kislev 2, 5759. The conclusion of the Virtues of Esther and the Tribunal of Mordechai ha-Tzadik (Esther 2) is an extraordinary revelation that touches more concretely for the first time the question of the Hidden Goel, Haim, when he was in the world. In the Book of Esther 1 was revealed the history of the Initial Signs in the School of the Essenes revealing the hitherto hidden history of the Star that Astounds. The Book of Esther 2 concentrates on the exposition of the name ASHER’, also filling in the historical gap concerning the Hidden Servants of God, the true Hidden Tzadikim, who maintained the merits for the world’s continuation especially in the past 2000 years.

Gnomen 2 - I at first wrote here the title ‘The Book of the School of Esther‘ The New ‘Shin’ and the New ‘Vav’ of the Final Redemption - The Tablets of Justice of the Tribunal of Mordechai ha-Tzadik’ as part of the New Scroll of the Final Redemption. These are the New Letters of SHUSHAN representing the New Purim of the Final Redemption. I know yet nothing of the contents of this text.

Gnomen 3 - The Scroll of the Final Redemption, once it opens does not close. Each text has to be closed but the Scroll goes on because it represents the living exposition of the Fourth Generation in course.

Gnomen 4 - (follows chapter 13 of Esther 2) In truth I passed through my Bar Mitzvah School without knowing anything of the Torah[1]. Only when I was 18 with my entrance into Yeshiva University (in New York) did I begin to walk on the path of the Halacha. I was always amazed about everything. I was alive. That seemed to me amazing enough. But here there were Jews who even wore tefilin[2] when they spoke on the telephone with their girl-friends.

Gnomen 5 - I remember Rabbi Riskin’s clamoring vociferously about that one. “I passed him by in the corridor” he screamed with talmudic joy, “and I stopped in my tracks to see the wonder. Did he really have a direct line to the Ribono shel Olam![3]

You can see, then, that I already had a full Jewish education before I got trapped into the Habad-cage. Had I had a girl-friend, I would not have spoken to her on the telephone while wearing tefilin. I took to heart that ‘direct line’ expression. It was the ‘direct line’ that I desired. The problem was that every time I searched for the ‘direct line’ I found myself searching for a girl-friend as well.

Gnomen 6 - It was not easy such a blotch on my conscious, so I went to the Campus Freudian Sage with a German Jewish beard to ask him why such a mitzvah as the circumcision was completely ruining my ‘direct line’ with the Master of the world. “Are you not afraid of Him?” asked the Rabbi Doctor with German lucidity. “Of course I am afraid of Him and certainly I wish not to do anything against His will. The problem is that instead of the ‘direct line’ that I must reach, everything I see and touch makes a ‘direct line’ to the middle section. Have you no remedy, Doctor, to help me get out of this body before it drags me under?

Gnomen 7 - “What do you mean ‘everything’?” his eyes lit up with psychoanalytic precision, joyous for my readiness to strip my mind before him. “Everything” I said with emphasis. “If it were only the problem of a girl-friend why would I have come to you? No, Doctor, it’s not that. Somewhere along the line, I exited from all distinctions of male, female, animal, plant life and even inanimate objects. Everything finds a way to excite me. The entire world, it seems to me, has come to squish and squash me with sexual desire.

Gnomen 8 - “Do you think the situation is very serious, Doctor?” “Not at all” he said smiling with the solution on his beard. “It is a simple case of Yetzer ha-ra[4]. You’ll get married. It’ll pass. See how clearly you expound on yourself. If there were a real problem, you would not be able to do such. Do not worry and don’t be afraid. You’re not meshuga[5]. Have a little more fear of Him and then you’ll get married afterwards and all this will go away. Zai a menshe un daiga nisht, vet zain gut[6].”

He’s certainly more rational than Freud, I concluded in my thoughts. The difference is that Freud never understood the Yetzer ha-ra and so he saw every evil as rooted in the sub-conscious for reasons of its own. But you can’t blame the negatives for the kinds of photos that were taken, can you!

Gnomen 9 - Nevertheless, that direct-line tefilin discourse of R. Riskin set me off into a long meditation and in the end was the real catalyst of my leaving the University and seeking the ‘direct line’ with Habad. R. Riskin’s quip irked my growing inner warp and excited my desire to know why my love could not yet be satisfied by tightly binding myself to the tefilin straps. Something was desperately wrong with me, I reasoned, and even for Minhhat Shabbat I could not sing freely with the others.

Gnomen 10 - At the Yeshiva University, I found German-Jewish-American Halachic Judaism. The German-Jewish part was quite strict and the American part quite watered down but, in general, I was seeing active, halachic Judaism in the context of Traditional studies. I had already a fair knowledge of modern Hebrew, having studied it in Weequahic High School in Newark, New Jersey, with Mr. Chasen, peace be with him, for 3 years. I had also been to Israel the summer before beginning at the University, having won that trip to Israel for 7 weeks for high grades. Mr. Chasen sent me with a Shomer ha-Tzair (non-religious Zionist) group.

Gnomen 11 - I myself had no idea of the various groups of Zionists, religious Zionists, socialist Zionists, non-religious Zionists etc. etc. and I never belonged to any group. Indeed, I never loved being part of groups of people, ideologically oriented, and I never really allowed myself to mix into any group, feeling myself too individualistic to ‘divide’ or ‘share’ myself with others. My individualism was very spiritual or, at least was taken by me as a question of my spiritual identity which, however, I had yet to delve into and try to define. I was born with strong inner faith in the One Living God, thank God, I’ve never known what doubts on this matter even mean.

Gnomen 12 - I believed, of course, in the Pesah of the Jewish people and I desired to study Torah and to know much more. I was therefore very enthusiastic about the Yeshiva University and the daily program of Jewish studies while greatly appreciating the double-program of secular subjects in which I majored in classical Greek. In truth I was a frustrated study-monger. I was always in the thought of using all my time for studying and reading but I was always thwarted from accomplishing that desire. I was always in conflict with wasted time and the conflict remained because I never used my time as I would have desired.

Gnomen 13 - DIARY: see (not brought here) diagram of the 13 New Mazalot[7] in their respective positions in their convergence with the 13 Stars of the Shoshanah.

Gnomen 14 - some notes received by Giuseppe[8] in the Tent: the New Mazalot give over the comprehension of oneself. In time, in the events (of the world and in one’s personal life) the Mazalot will come to explain themselves progressively;

The ‘eye’ of Balaam is representative of the New Mazalot, that is, the New Level of Prophecy that derives from the New Mazalot.

The ‘eye’ of Balaam permits the person to see himself, after one is on the level of always speaking just words and doing just actions; this is the Third Eye ‘above’ that brings the words and the actions to their completion in the proper and true prospective desired;

Gnomen 15 - the New Mazalot are the new roots of the future; this means that the person born under the New Mazal is already rooted in the ‘sources’ of the Final Redemption;

shtum ha-’ain’[9] and ‘giluiainaim’ are three eyes;

in one sense, every person has a third eye, possibly called the ‘eye of prophetic vision’;

the ‘third eye’ of the Donkey who eats Bread opens the eye of prophetic vision for the world; in order for mankind to receive this third eye, it needs the third eye of the Donkey;

the third eye represents the true Middle Way[10] between the extremes;

the third eye is hidden above the brain, slightly above the forehead (but the Three Eyes of the Donkey, received in a dream of Giuseppe, were in a line, as the 3 Stars in the Sign of the Stars). -

Gnomen 16 - DIARY: some hidden Signs of Esther: in Davide Levi’s dream, Peretz says “Shin, Sheen, it is the Dead Donkey speaking to you”. The double Shin refers to SHUSHAN[11]. Together the 2 Shins give over the New KTAV SHUSHAN[12] (the Writing of SHUSHAN) which allows for the writing of the New Scroll of Esther of the Final Redemption, in the permission of the Final Goel, Haim.

Gnomen 17 - DIARY: our Michail Esther (who is from Persia (Iran) originally) had her work concerning the Cuneiform Tablets that she possesses requested from someone in Beersheva, someone from Ben Gurion University. At the same time, by an obviously ‘providential’ error, she received a fax which was of the Queen Pahlevi, wife of the ex Shah of Persia who wrote the fax to some poet in the United States. These are ‘hidden signs’: the New Kingdom of the School of Esther of Beersheva is beginning to come unto its Reign among the universal kingdoms (the extensions of Babylon, Persia, Greece, Rome, of Ahhashverosh. This is in conjunction to our Web-Site Camillo[13], directed by Solly Kamkhaji in Beersheva.

Gnomen 18 - The Hherem Mi-Deoraita[14] of the Five Tablets of the Pact (which is on the Web-site Camillo) is bound to the 5 Stars of the Higher Tribunal of Mordechai ha-Tzadik. Since the end of the 13th year and the death of Beniamino noster, the Sign of the Donkey who eats Bread was allowed to continue as the successful mission of the last prophecy in Malachi and the final prophesied New Pact of the Prophet Jeremy, the Signs of Purim abound and the Correspondences between the Tribunal and the Kingdom of Esther are continual. Also in the 14th General Volume of the Book of the Stars (written in the 15th year of the Completed Signs and still in hand-writing) was full with ‘hidden Purim Signs’ hidden in the Festival of San Remo.

Gnomen 19 - All the New Purim Signs represent the Hidden and Strategic Ways in which the Final Redemption arrives to the Jewish people.


Gnomen 20 - That ‘direct line’ tefilin joke had had meaning for me. Most of the Jews among the Yitzhhak Elhhanan program of Yeshiva University, not the teachers who were, in general, rabbis, but the students, seemed to me ‘part-time’ Jews. I had not the experience to measure meaningfully the various classes of Jews that I found at the University but, in general, it seemed to me that those who have had the great fortune of studying the true Tradition must be fully dedicated to it.

Gnomen 21 - I didn’t find the fire that I was searching for to help me ignite the burning faith that was always within me from the youngest days remembered. I was, I suppose, not exactly a run of the mill person. I was, first of all, over-desirous in whatever I wanted.

DIARY: from DIARY of Little-Fishy Natiul: December 30, 1998, Tevet 11, 5759, the first day of the New Month of Big Fish, Leviathan, which enters just as White Horse completed his revision of the New Stellar Calendar of Leviathan. This is the month of the Heavenly Perfume. The days are counted from mid-night to mid-night.

Gnomen 22 - Friday, 1:00, first of January 1999, Tevet 12, 5759, Heavenly Perfume 2: I declared this year, in virtue of the ‘triple nine’ Year of the Triple Verification, Year of the Triple Meditation and the Year of the Triple Jump.

Gnomen 23 - DIARY: Jan. 6, 1999: Dream of Davide Levi of hair growing from his tongue. I told him that he must prepare himself to speak of the Final Redemption without hair on his tongue. - Solly sent me a document on the Essenes. - Dream of Gilat Haim receiving ‘wing’ (of White Horse) as she saw Shaul who had a house between Palestinians and Shiites. - Giuseppe dreamed a decree on north Italy in which it was said that now the decrees will begin to descend rapidly. - Davide Levi dreamed that he said to Netanyahu “You will fall because you made 2 errors. One is that you didn’t do anything to placate the Palestinians. But most of all, and I speak in the name of the Tzadik Haim, Rosh le-lamed-vav tzadikim nistarim[15], because you were elected by the vote of the Habadiim”. - -

Gnomen 24 - All is faith and faith is all. We are believers. We believe in the Lord, our God; we believe in the Patriarchs; we believe in the Law of God brought by Moses, our teacher. We believe in the Prophets of Israel and in the great mission of the Prophet Elijah and we believe in the 3 Redemptions of EHEYE ASHER EHEYE.

I must warn the pupils of the Goel Haim of the danger of complacency in the faith.

Gnomen 25 - In truth, the faculty of faith is a God-given gift planted in the depth of one’s heart. It is, however, necessary to distinguish between the knowledge of the true faith and between actively living before God in the true faith. Every precept must be fulfilled in the active felicity of the heart in feeling the closeness and the love of the Lord, our God, upon us.

Gnomen 26 - The inner soul of Sinai cannot but reject the deification of a man. The Christians remained simple in their faith of God but confused in and doubtful of Christian theology.

Gnomen 27 - Many, throughout the ages, were innocent victims of that confusion. Because of the Trinitarian disability, their concentration on God Almighty in prayer was damaged. These ‘lost sheep of the house of Israel’ often became ‘intellectually’ damaged for reason of the false doctrines and dogmas inculcated in them. They were blocked off from true thoughts and from coherency in the faith.

Gnomen 28 - Christianity was doomed to false Trinitarian bindings and so Christian minds became bound up with the limitations of non-reasoning and non-logic since the time of Paulus.

Gnomen 29-36 - It is for reason of this rooted superficiality of non-thinking, that the lost sheep of the house of Israel must be warned, after they have already been circumcised and converted onto the Altar of Efraim, not to fall into complacency in their faith. The return is, of course, filled with new joys. The soul is happy having found that for which it has been waiting centuries and even millennia. There is immediate illumination of the mind and the heart, an effulgence of new comprehension and new thought paths in a previous desert flowing now with a renewed spirit.

Gnomen 37 - Now you know and now you fully believe in the Completed Signs of the Final Redemption and you are pupils of the chosen Tzadik Haim. You believe too in the Brays of the Donkey whether of Sinai or Bethlehem or Big Fish, Leviathan. Do not be complacent in your faith. You must yet learn to stand straight before God and before people, because your yes has not been a yes and your no has not been a no for generations and the distortions of Paul’s language have left serious historical wounds that must yet be healed.

Gnomen 38 - We are in the generation of the Great Stellar Convergence and that which is life will be called life and that which is death will be called death. The Holy Torah is Life. The language of Paul’s theology is death. This is the generation of its agony and death. This is the time of the great fall of the fallen-tongue because the Redemptional Stars are shining only on the New Pure Language of the Third and Final Redemption. Paul’s Christianity has only to live out its agony until it is no more. The Torah will be enlarged for the world. Traditional Christianity will not go on in time.

Gnomen 39 - And yet do not become complacent in your faith. As the happiness and exhilaration of a thirsty man without water in the desert who is suddenly presented with pure drinking water, so have you been given the marvellous news of the great salvation that has entered the world. You have been redeemed but you must yet redeem the faculties within you that have taken the historical brunt of Pauline formations.

Gnomen 40 - You have been saved from death and you been brought out of the desert but now you must drink water every day to replenish the fountains of salvation that are in you and you must eat well every day to strengthen the limbs of your mind that they may stand on their own and walk with confidence on the straight paths of the living faith. Blessed is the Lord, our God, who sends the Pure Tongue of the Completed Signs of the Final Redemption.

Gnomen 41 - Blessed is the Lord, our God, who opens for us the New Humble Brain of the Final Redemption. The New Brain is sent into the world when that of the lost sheep of the house of Israel has been shattered beyond all correction. In His great love and mercy for Efraim, His precious son, He cannot suffer, so to speak, to see the forlorn state of mental inactivity. Then does He give orders to begin opening the treasure-houses of the New Humble Brain reserved for the redeemed in the Final Redemption.

Gnomen 42 - You have retained and maintained your derech eretz[16] and now do honour unto your soul; have her stand up before the Throne of Glory to ask of the coming of the New Humble Brain. For there is no correction for you as you are but there is new force for what you may become. Only a totally new imposed structure can lift you out of the past. If you need Donkey Strength, be a Donkey, but you need the direct mercy of the Lord, our God, upon you so that the Bird of Israel be Resurrected. And you need the direct force of God upon you to combat the Fish’s Battles against habit.

Gnomen 43 - You need the Weights of a Donkey to remind you to be humble. You need the slowness of a Turtle to slow down the Fast Fourth Generation Pace of your thoughts so that you be Illumined in the richness of God’s closeness. You need the Neck-height of the Giraffe to help you elevate your thoughts above the day’s banalities. You need the direct mercy of the Lord, our God, to help you enter the Design of the Final Redemption and to organise your thoughts in its Composite Project.

Gnomen 44 - You need the closed Refuge-house of sealed lips with an armadillo casing to save you from the habits of the fallen tongue. You need a Lake of Salt to eat away the mental crusts of time-laden disuse. You need a Valley of Mercury to awaken the balances and measures and to gain the courage to enter in depth. In all these you need the direct mercy of God Almighty upon you to guide you so that you be in step with every minute and certainly not later than the Minute’s End.

Gnomen 45 - You need the direct mercy of God upon you to know again the Heavenly Perfume in which the soul delights; for centuries you have been without the scent to which your soul yearns. And once again you need to gird yourself in the precision of the Lion’s Den so that you walk on sure footing in the Law of God. Then shall you feel the Beauty of Paradise in your heart and you will feel the direct mercy of the Lord, our God, within you, shining on the New Tablets of your heart.

Gnomen 46 - This is the Tikkun (correction) of White Horse who died, poor Horse, and left a Wing with Gilat Haim. And in the Sign of the Resurrection of the Teacher Haim, White Horse has been resurrected having the New Title of the Chief Instructor of all Horses, White or Red or whatever colours they may be. And so the title of White Horse was saved by the Joy of Life[17] while the Resurrected Horse himself became a fervent teacher of the New Calendar of Leviathan, in the power of which he himself has seen the sign of his own resurrection with the direct mercy of the God of Israel upon him. Amen.

Gnomen 47 - The Tikkun of White Horse (Paolo Fierro) with his ‘death’ represents the death of the fallen tongue created by Paulus and his ‘resurrection’ represents the salvation by way of the New Language of the Final New Pact. It also coincides with the historical new opening of the New Stellar Calendar of Big Fish, Leviathan, the last great feat of White Horse before this Correction. It is, of course, a general Tikkun, especially designed for the lost sheep of the house of Israel who return unto the confines of the their true origin by way of the Altar of Efraim in the House of Prayer of the Third and Final Redemption of 7 Floors, 13 Altars and the carpet of Islam, in merit of the Final Goel, Haim.

Gnomen 48 - The great gift of the New Humble Brain has been sent by God Almighty to recompense for the immense historical absence into which their destiny had thrown them. They must therefore try to live inside the New Knowledge and the New Spirit of the Completed Signs and to become another in all ways. Pray only to El SHADDAI directly and allow His holy Presence to shine upon you. Amen.

Gnomen 49 - Be bound to the Goel Haim, with all your heart, as much as you are able, for you may fully love the Teacher who is teaching you the true ways of God This relationship as a true pupil to the true teacher chosen by the Lord, our God, is extremely loved before Him. It is also part of the true respect so loved by the Lord, our God.

Gnomen 50 - Bind your thoughts to the new teachings of Sefer Mishnat Haim for in them you will find the strength of the coherent voice that accompanies every word, in all its texts, and that binds you to the Sign of the Stars of the Final Redemption. In these texts, studied in the true faith of the true Tradition, you will find the Living Voice of Prophecy. For the ways in which God manifests Himself to individuals are infinite but the prophetic Guidance of the Final Redemption is ‘channelled’ into the Prophetic Writings of Sefer Mishnat Haim, on the authority of the Tzadik, the chosen Goel, Haim.



Chapter 2


Gnomen 51 - DIARY of the Donkey who eats Bread: Jan. 6, 1999, Tevet 18, 5759, Heavenly Perfume 8.

Noda in a dream Wednesday morning saw Beniamino noster[18] in our house. They greeted and were so happy to see each other that they cried for joy. Noda also said to Beniamino “I am happy that now you can stay close to us”.

Gnomen 52 - With the sign of the death and resurrection of White Horse and the new blessings that uplift the Double-Tail of the Donkey, there has been a marvellous New Marriage between the Kingdom of Heaven and the earth, a Marriage that corresponds to the Sign of the Great New Reconciliation of the New Humble Brain and the Heart.

Gnomen 53 - Jacob, our father, is the Cord of his inheritance. Jacob, our father, is the Seal of the Holy Inheritance given by EL SHADDAI. Those are the blessings of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob, to them for the sake of their descendants forever.

Gnomen 54 - And yet Jacob, our father, Seal and Binding Cord to the Blessings of the true Tradition of Israel, did not receive the blessing of Isaac without having to undergo the harsh accusations of Esau (Gen. 27: 36) ‘And he said, “Is it not thus that he called his name Jacob (ya’acov) and he has fooled me (ye’akveini) twice; he took the right of the first-born and behold, now, he has taken my blessing” and he said “have you then not reserved for me any blessing!”

Gnomen 55 - In memory of my beloved mother Ann (Becker) Green. - The same root of the name Jacob comes also in the form of ‘eikev’ (heel) at his birth (ibid, 25: 26) And afterwards came out his brother, and his hand held on to the heel of Esau, and he called his name Jacob, and Isaac was 60 years old in their birth.

We already know that the ‘messianic blessing to be received by the people of Jacob comes at a time in which the outer bearing of the Jewish people is equal to the ‘crudeness of the field’ of Esau. The garments of the field containing the healthy, vigorous and perfumed scent of nature were most pleasing to Isaac, our father, who indeed loved Esau also because of his love and attachment to the natural world.

Gnomen 56 - There is a time for the reception of the blessing in which the voice of Jacob is not sufficient of itself to merit to the blessing; Esau’s garments of the natural field-life are needed. This was in the time of the rebirth of the State of Israel. The voice of Jacob was heard especially in the garments of non-religious or less than traditional Jews, in the perfumed scent of Israel’s fields, the revitalisation of its nature and the love of Israel’s land in its promised return to the heredity of the Patriarchs.

Gnomen 57 - What is to Israel is to Israel but what becomes of the lost sheep of the house of Israel? How is the claim of Esau justified historically. What might the Christian nations of Esau mean if they claim that Jacob, the Jewish people, fooled them twice, it stole their right of the first-born and it stole their blessing? Only when the Final New Message has been revealed can the matter be approached. What has Christianity had that it might lose in the end?

Gnomen 58 - The Initial Universal Joseph Signs were at the basis of the Mission of Yeshua. Indeed, they went out to the nations of Christianity because the place of the nations is within the framework of the Universal Salvation, not in the ‘Jewish’ salvation. This is because they are not commanded directly in the laws of the Torah as are the children of Israel. Thus the mission of Yeshua was bound up to the salvation of the lost sheep of the children of Israel who are bound to the right of the first-born.

Gnomen 59 - Indeed, Christianity itself would not have thrived on the Esau merit by itself. If the lost sheep of the house of Israel had not been in the Christian folds, with the ‘hidden signs of the first-born right of Joseph’ within them, Christianity would not have come into existence. Christianity thus has had the birth-right of the first-born, in virtue of the Messianic Signs of Joseph for the salvation of the lost sheep. These Signs, however, and the Salvation that they bring, are completed only in the Final New Pact, a Salvation for the lost sheep but that extends to all the Descendants of Malchitzedek. The birth-right of Joseph returns home.

Gnomen 60 - Esau’s highly anguished crying and his desperate request to cling to some as yet ungiven blessing of Isaac, refers to the anguished and desperate Christianity when the Final Signs arrive and the death of the historical and theological Christianity is decreed. The prophetic answer of Isaac, our father, covers, of course, the full gamut of Christian history; the ‘fats of the land’ (ibid, 27: 28) are the fat-stuff of Roman Catholicism. Esau’s great extension is due to the breaking of God’s yoke on the part of the descendants of Jacob. For the rest, Esau lives by the sword, the sword of terrestrial power, of money and prestige. In that terrible moment of realisation, Isaac himself must admit that he already blessed Jacob and Jacob is blessed and all those who curse him will be cursed.

Gnomen 61 - The fact is that Esau’s conception of his father’s blessing was not the same as it was for Jacob. Esau reasoned that his father’s blessing meant everything good in life, health, riches, the love of many women, power and honor. Jacob searched for the light of God’s truth and he stayed in the tent to meditate on God’s laws. History is testimony.

Gnomen 62 - Time moves on. The Final New Pact will become known and millions of people who were previously Christians will become part of the Altar of Malchitzedek. Jesus will become humanised and Jewish will understand the truth of that true Messianic Mission. In essence, from the moment the Final Signs were received on earth, all Christianity loses its raison d’etre. The true birth-right of Yeshua returns to Jacob and the true blessing of Isaac, our father, descends on those who receive the Completed Signs of the Third and Final Redemption and who live under the guidance of the Teacher Haim.

Gnomen 63 - (Jan. 13, 1999) DIARY: Solly sent me (Jan. 8, 1999) a document from the Judaic Studies Program University of Central Florida concerning the Essenes and the Qumran Community. Very interesting study concerning the dichotomy between Tzadokites of those times who were, in some way, involved with the Essenes as opposed to the Sadducees who remained in Jerusalem, those that we generally hear of, etc. There is some level of truth in this thesis of Professor Shiffman (on whose research the document is mainly based) although, in essence, it changes nothing, and is virtually irrelevant regarding the founding of the School at the hands of the Teacher of Justice, as we have received it etc.

DIARY: Jan. 15, 1999, Tevet 27, 5759, Heavenly Perfume 17: I saw in a flash-dream just before waking that I was writing here on this table a text (which it seems to me carried some conotation of a ‘concluding text’). As I was writing the first few pages, I saw the book grow and ‘flourish’ into a full book. - -

I recognise the possible messianic sign of "Tzmiha" - ‘to flourish’ or ‘grow rapidly’ - our School of the Shoshana itself, at this point, very much needs the Sign of Tzmiha in order to sprout up.

Gnomen 64 - From the beginning of this Book, I began telling something of my own story. Why? Do I want to be known? I can’t really answer that. Must I become known? Obviously, it’s a goal of the Donkey to stand on his Tail and to bray. Nevertheless, the becoming famous of the Donkey is not outside in the plaza nor anywhere else outside in public to announce the Final Redemption. There is absolutely no permission for me to do such, as shown recently in a dream to Noda in which I went dressed in a blue sweat-suit to a park and as I began to announce the Redemption, lightning came down from heaven and fulminated me. Noda, however, prayed to EL SHADDAI and I was resuscitated. The Tail of the Donkey, however, Anna G., Davide L., Solly K., Paolo F., Daniele M., Giuseppe M. and Noda, have permission to diffuse the Messages through the channels given us in the context of the School of Shoshana in Italy and the Beit Sefer Esther in Israel and eventually the School of the Yellow Rose in the U.S., also by way of Internet.

Gnomen 65 - The problem, of course, as usual, is not with the Donkey. When the Third Redemption Donkey gets into the scene, his past is only in the Books, even though it’s all to discover. I, however, had some real problems with autobiographical sketches of all his former life, before the age of 23-24 when he met and became talmid of the Tzadik Haim. I am not sure if the book seen by me this morning refers to my autobiography or to something else, but for the moment I have no other clues to work on. Therefore I’m speaking my heart out to see what happens.

Gnomen 66 - Before knowing the Tzadik Haim, what was I? A Habadi, with a Habadi beard and Habadi beliefs. Who knows what an ungracious mess and an undisciplined soul the Tzadik Haim looked at the first time he found me in the Synagogue (mostly Habadi) of Via Cellini in Milan. Later on, however, the hidden Tzadik Haim told me that he had seen me and followed me from my birth and that he knew everything about me.

Gnomen 67 - The Tzadik also revealed to me that he had been ‘forced’ to bring me to Milan ‘before the designated time’. He had seen my state, the desperate state of my soul because of the depths of impurity that I had reached, deep into the Habad roots of unfounded Mysticism. If more time had been allowed, explained the teacher Haim, head of the 36 Hidden Tzadikim, it would have become too late and impossible to redeem me from there. The Tzadik had looked deeply into the matter and he had seen that there was no choice.

Gnomen 68 - Habad was the very particular chapter that I had to know thoroughly and to be a full-fledged part of from which I was redeemed by the Hidden Tzadik, Haim. Also before Habad, however, I had been severely caught in the traps of impure spirits, impure sexual spirits and impure depressive spirits. There was a dream that shows me in the clutches of the ‘other side’ when I was younger. My brain would have been destroyed a million times had not the God of Israel bestowed on me the great desire to study languages and to read and to gain knowledge. I would otherwise never have come through it. And if not for the hidden prayers of the hidden Tzadik who kept an eye on the one who was destined to become his talmid.

Gnomen 69 - Also the guitar helped me assuage the inner conflicts that tormented me from 12 to 22. Except for a few isolated times, I never really fell into serious states of depression but a terrible amount of sexual frustration anguished my soul into desperate prayers. In 1991 I received in a dream at Houston Texas permission to compose a text, on my own name and not in the context of Sefer Mishnat Haim, on the depths of impurity into which I had fallen in previous years. That text, if it becomes reality[19], is to be personal and not associated with the Tzadik Haim whom I still didn’t know.

Gnomen 70 - Why then speak of myself before 23? I was really nothing to define; never quiet, never able to relax, tormented by thoughts, desirous of gaining knowledge but relatively unsuccessful for many reasons. In all this, however, I constantly searched for ways to know the closeness of God Almighty. I was not a follower, not one to be part of groups or clubs. I was an individualist looking for my way. I loved words. Words were poetry to my ears. I would repeat words that I liked many times to hear their sound. This gave me the desire to study other languages. All languages had their beautiful words and their musicality and their poetic sense. My spirit was quite poetic; I should perhaps have written poetry.

Gnomen 71 - I have always had faith in God Almighty and I have never known doubts.

DIARY: Jan. 16, 1999, Tevet 28, 5759, Heavenly Perfume 18: Paolo and Noda fasted Shabbat for me after I woke up from a dream of condemnation to death. I did not know for what reason and I began to pray and to ask God to remove this decree. -

Gnomen 72 - I was a wonderer, always searching, influenced certainly by oriental meditation, to get out of my body and to reach a higher state of being. From the age of 13 it began just after the death of my grandfather Max Green. At 11, I had Mommy buy me a black leather jacket and with my guitar in hand I imitated Elvis Presley. At 12 I wanted to be a famous baseball catcher but as a hobby I also collected precious mineral stones that a friend of the family used to bring me. At school I would cut up as much as possible, loving attention and trying to make people laugh. I was even worse at Hebrew School but my Bar Mitzvah was getting closer and I had to learn my Haftarah. But then Paternal Grandpa Max Green died, just a month before my Bar Mitzvah.

Gnomen 73 - That was an event in my life that shook me up and woke me up and set me on a different course. Grandpa had died but I knew he was there. His body had died but he had not died, I felt it. When I saw him in the coffin at the funeral, I spoke to him mentally and I felt his presence. The understanding that life itself would have no purpose if it ended with death was innate in me but when Grandpa died this concept became alive in me. I was somewhat stunned but wondrous that he had died just before the Bar Mitzvah that he so desired to see. I reasoned that he had been given to see my Bar Mitzvah from the world of truth.

Gnomen 74 - My Bar Mitzvah passed with colour light bulbs set up in our backyard by Uncle Dave (Becker). Lots of people came and ate turkey and other dishes and cakes and they drank shnops[20] and wine. Also a microphone was set up so I could read my speech. In Shule everything had gone well Shabbat, the day before, both the Haftorah reading (va-yiftah ha-giladi[21]) and the Bar Mitzvah speech. Some nice money Bar Mitzvah gifts were received and everything was fine. But I kept looking at Grandma. She was seated at a table in dark garb. She was no longer the Grandma that I knew. Her body was there but her mind and spirit was with Grandpa in the upper world. I saw it in her face and in the expression of her eyes. Hers is the only facial image that I remember from among those at the Bar Mitzvah; not even the face of Mom or Dad in that event, no one, only Grandma’s.

Gnomen 75 - I had, of course, felt the presence of Grandpa. He was there, looking on from above but close and he was smiling because his grandson had been bar-mitzvahed. I felt his presence close to me and now, even more than in the month from the funeral to the Bar Mitzvah, I felt myself inwardly changed. I wondered if also the others of the family felt how alive Grandpa had become and I searched out their faces and asked of their feelings and questioned them on death. I had soon to come to the realisation that the entire manner in which I was perceiving Grandpa’s death was very far removed from the thoughts of the others. I therefore told nothing of the message I received from Grandpa about a month after the Bar Mitzvah.

Gnomen 76 - I sat on my bed in a sort of Yoga meditation position, trying, as usual, to find the place in my mind that was the door to leaving the body. I could, however, never quite leave the body because every time I found the door, other ‘worldly’ desires would always come just at that moment. In that sitting, however, it was not so because I was concentrated on Grandpa and I was extremely serious. With my eyes closed, I felt him come and in my mind I heard him speak. “Look now at what I am showing you”. I envisioned a sort of garden with colored flowers. Grandpa said, “You are looking at a place in another country; it is there that you will have to go. Remember what I tell you, you will have to use your brain very much and you will need your whole brain to accomplish that which you have to accomplish. It is not now and it will not be here but in another land”.

Gnomen 77 - At 13, I also had my first romance, an interesting girl who would beep me by telephone in Morse code that she loved me. The problem was that I would lose my patience in beeping her back. We probably differed somewhat on what romantic meant. Her father, of German-Jewish extraction, was a ham-radio enthusiast and Donna, his daughter, was on the same track. I liked her because she was different than the other girls, she played baseball and she was on the boy’s patrol and she was great on clarinet. After school, we would go together to a candy store and play the pinball machine together. Those were the good old days when pinball machines were still pinball machines.

Gnomen 78 - Sometimes I took her to the movies and afterwards I would walk here home; at the end of a narrow alleyway before she would retreat, she would give me permission to kiss her on the lips and to hold her tight. I had finally conquered the universe and I loved her and until this day, I don’t know what foolishness got into me to make me lose her. There had been a party of school-mates where lights would be turned off once in a while for some extra kissing when spin-the-bottle activities had dulled to boredom. At a certain dark point, I found myself responding to the quite passionate kisses of one of Donna’s ‘best’ friends’ and that devilish tigress really swung me under her spell and made my head swim. A day later, Donna called to tell me it was finished between us; that ‘best’ friend of hers had called her and revealed how I tried to make it with her and how I had forced her into kissing me etc. etc.

Gnomen 79 - Tears, illumination, regret and a broken heart. I had heard that many females were cats but I had never been meowed and scratched by one before. I suddenly realised for the first time that evil existed and that false cunning was dangerous and that it was easy enough to fall into the traps. At the same time, my heart was broken inside because, trap or not, I had broken the confidence that had bound Donna and myself, a fidelity that once broken, even only one time, could never again return to the state of purity that it had known. Confidence had to be 100 percent, otherwise it was not true confidence. Then too I realised why I had loved Donna. She was not like that. There was nothing false in her. She was not a liar, not a conniver, not seeking to take advantage of someone else for her own gain. Inside, I smashed myself to pieces for my folly.

Gnomen 80 - The pain of that realisation came when I again saw Donna. I searched for her, distraught, hoping and praying that I might correct the error. I remember her face when she came outside from her house to meet me. She had had complete confidence in me. I too loved her but immaturity had not allowed me to appreciate what I had had. Because of a foolish moment, I had ruined everything. Fedelity was not something you could piece back together once it was broken. Tears, illumination, regret and a broken heart.

Gnomen 81 - I relate this episode because it had a profound influence on me. I pleaded with her to forgive me, acknowledging the inane stupidity of my falling into the trap. She forgave me. I begged her to allow me to kiss her again and she agreed. But I had so deluded her that it would never be the same. Had she been only angry, it would have been easier. Anger, as it comes, may go. But she was deluded. She was no longer able to see me as she had seen me before. She tried to, because her feelings for me were very strong but she could not unblock herself from the inner disappointment that she had undergone. We tried yet for some months to be again boy-friend and girl-friend but the binding force of that innocent and pure confidence was missing, never to return. She could not see me as she had seen me before; this was my inner pain, that I had fallen in her eyes.

Gnomen 82 - After a few months we decided to break up; I no longer remember the circumstance but my love for her continued in me with heart felt suffering for at least 2 full years afterwards. I wrote a stage-play for my English class in which the young suffering protagonists acted out the state of anguish that I had known in my frustrated love for Donna. My teacher (this was Junior High School), a woman (and a Jewish Hebrew School teacher as well) was so shaken by the passion and deep-felt suffering of a broken heart, that she called me for a personal chat. She explained very gently that according to her, the emotions expressed in said play were anything but those of a normal 14 year old. The depth of the emotiveness and the tragic sense of inner suffering, she explained, demonstrated strong psychological disturbances. She suggested that I be sent to a psychologist so that I might work out my problems.

Gnomen 83 - I decided that instead of going to a psychologist, I would meditate on human psychology and try to understand what the mind was all about. At the same time I began to study Latin and the love of language study began to take root. In that period I was also part of the WBGO radio Workshop School-Radio Program, an FM station. I studied diction and voice and was well received by the director, taking part in several programs. I remember organising and directing several folk music programs, played and sung by friends of mine. Most of those years were spent in mental turmoil while at the same time from 13 onwards, I was awakened to the intellect and my desire for knowledge grew with me in time. I might say now that my vision of Grandpa and his message was my Garden. Then I met up with the Serpentess and she coaxed me into eating a bit of fruit, after which my eyes were opened and I saw how shamefully naked I was.

Gnomen 84 - From 14 to 15 (8th and 9th grades) I was in the very modern Clinton Avenue Junior High School and from 15 to 18 (10th, 11th and 12th grades) I was in Weequahic High School, both in Newark, New Jersey. From 18 to 19 I was at the Yeshiva University and from 19 to 23 I was part of the Lubovitcher Movement; from 19 to 21 in Crownheights Brooklyn and from 21 to 23 in Brunoi (Suburbs of Paris) France, at the Lubovitcher Yeshiva there. From 13 to 19 I was, in general, in a state of great conflict between that which I sought to be and that which I was in practice, between a level of purity that I desired to reach and the insistence of impure thoughts and actions that brought me down into very impure realms, between a level of knowledge that I craved to acquire and the immense limitations that I found in myself.

Gnomen 85 - Between my High School Graduation and my entering the Yeshiva University in uptown Manhattan, I went to Israel with a group from the Yehuda Ha-Tza’ir (Yound Judea), one of the non-religious Zionist groups. I was in Israel for 6 weeks during which fell my 18th birthday.

DIARY: Jan. 20, 1999, Shvat 3, 5759, Heavenly Perfume 22: Giuseppe dreamed that he held an antique book of wisdom; its wisdom was very profound and, at the same time, new. Giuseppe, reading the book, understood that this was the Book of Wisdom of the True Middle Way. Jesus was not mentioned in it. Peretz wanted to read the book and Giuseppe gave it over to him. - - (Then, after another 3 dreams,) Giuseppe saw another Book which was the ‘completion’ of the first: Giuseppe understood that the Teacher Haim, was behind them. - -

Gnomen 86 - In Giuseppe’s dream, permission is given to the Donkey (by way of Giuseppe who’s in Sweet-Donkey-Sign now since he can speak outside to whomever he wants) to formulate two books to be called, God willing, Book of Wisdom, Ancient and New, of the True Middle Way). Yeshua is not mentioned in the Book because the teachings of Jesus do not correspond to the Middle Way. Compare ‘if someone slaps you on the right cheek’ etc. ‘if your eye betrays you’ etc. ‘tear it out’ etc., ‘whoever wants to follow me, let him take up his cross’ etc. The Final Revelation itself reveals the true Way of the Middle between two extremes which of themselves, having been on the extreme, cannot be the true Middle Way. This is, however, a new historical equilibrium given only by the Completed Signs of the Final Redemption in merit of the Final Goel, Haim. It is he who has been chosen by God Almighty to teach to the world the true Middle Way.

Gnomen 87 - I was in Israel for 6 weeks that summer. My feeling for Israel was simple, with temimut. This was the homeland promised by God to the Jewish people. It was the historical miracle of God after the Holocaust. The only other thing I knew was that I loved the Hebrew language and I would read Hayim Nahman Bialik’s poetry with great relish and with enthusiasm to look up every word I didn’t know. My pockets were always filled with daily lists of new words, a custom I had taken to from the age of 16, with French, Russian, Greek, Hebrew and even Indonesian.


[1] My name in Hebrew, Peretz, was given to me in this school (My parents called me Paul). Only my grandfather Heshel Becker used to call me Pesah.

[2] Phylacteries worn by Jews during the morning prayer.

[3] Master of the world.

[4] The evil-inclination.

[5] Crazy.

[6] Be a man and don’t worry, everything will be OK.

[7] The 13 New Constellations of Big Fish Leviathan.

[8] Giuseppe Manigrasso, from Milano, our Sweet-Donkey Baby Prophet.

[9] Said of Balaam when prophecy came upon him ‘of a closed eye and revealed or open eyes’. -

[10] This is the True Middle Way searched for by Sages throughout history but it is revealed only with the Revelation of the Third and Final Redemption.

[11] SHUSHAN is Susa, the Capital city of the Persian Empire at the time of the Miracle of Purim. In the Hebrew there are 4 letters SHEEN VAV SHEEN NUN SOFIT, thus two SHEENS. In Davide’s dream the pronunciation of the first SHEEN was short while of the second it was long and drawn out. Probably the Dead Donkey needs the Miraculous Miracle of the New Purim of the Final Redemption to resuscitate him. Hi-haw, hi-haw!

[12] Aterwards we stopped using the term KTAV SHUSHAN. The basic intention refers to all that which concerns the revelation of the stars of Esther in the kingdom of Ahhashverosh, but the term KTAV (writing) is unnecessary and it could even create confusion.

[13] Afterwards we established the website Beit-Sefer-Esther.com with the documents of Sefer Mishnat Haim.

[14] My text in Hebrew, ‘The Excommunication from the Torah’.

[15] The Head of the 36 Hidden Tzadikim

[16] Respect and proper behavior with all people, with parents, with the elderly, with teachers, at the table, and for sacred things, the Torah, the Holy Scripture, the Synagogue or Place of Prayer etc. I therefore keep the term in Hebrew because it’s not possible to translate with one term.

[17] Symbolized by my daughter Gilat Haim meaning the Joy of Life. -

[18] Beniamino Perico, from Milan, a faithful Donkey of the Mission, was tragically killed, at 32 years old, in a work accident, having to jump down from a building scaffold when the chain of a crain broke and the crain was falling upon those on the scaffold. It was for all of us an unbearable anguish but we were forced to realize that exactly 13 weeks before his death, the Goel Haim said in one dream to our friend Sarah Marcus that he would have to ‘take’ someone for the benedit of mankind; at the same time, in another dream to Giordano Levi, the Tzadik Haim said that the pupils had to make a ‘sign of mourning’ accomplished by not eating the first fruits, for 13 weeks. Only after Beniamino’s death and the immediate Sign of his resurrection on the morning of his funeral, did we realize that it was, unfortunately, a necessary ‘sacrifice’ for the sake of saving the Mission of the Donkey who eats Bread and Beniamino, in his enormous faith in God, in the Goel Haim, and in the Mission of the Donkey, had been chosen for that sacrifice.

[19] It was never written.

[20] Liquor in Yiddish.

[21] Judges (11, 1) ‘and Yiphtah from Gilad was a very strong soldier’ etc.